Monday, August 16, 2010
Spanking vs. Orgasm
“Orgasm schmorgasm! Just hit me harder!” these are the words I uttered and keep being reminded of.
My friend, as if I really need to point out, is NOT a switch and has no interest in being submissive. Therefore, in my opinion, as a man (a WONDERFUL man!!) he loves having orgasms. Nothing wrong with that.
He also loves me having orgasms. The people I know would say this is a really nice problem to have (and I’m not calling it a problem).
But there are differences. I am the type of person who has to have a fantasy in her head in order to have an orgasm. If my mind is blank, it won’t happen. And I have a very active fantasy life, so it’s usually not that big a deal, but it is effort. I do have to conjure something up and as My Friend plays my body like a fiddle (BIG GRIN!), if I find what is in my head isn’t working, then I have to draw upon my backlog of other fantasies. (Lately, the recurring theme has been spanking scenarios with 60’s television characters).
My Friend understands that and has never made it seem wrong or odd. In fact, the most wonderful thing about this man is that nothing is wrong. The fact that I can only cum with his fingers, the fact that I can only cum with his fingers in maybe 2 certain areas on my body, the fact that he has a hard time moving his fingers because I clamp his wrist between my thighs with all my might when he’s in the best spot. The fact that my body is so overly sensitive and ticklish and weird. He calls it challenging which makes me love him even more. All this? My body? My orgasms? The fantasies and positioning they require as a result of my screwed up body? It’s complicated.
Spanking is simple. It’s so simple and when I’m being spanked, my mind feels 100% relaxed. Practically blank. I can talk and joke and laugh or yell or cry out or scream, but it’s all just a reaction to him. I don’t have to think about anything. My entire body relaxes, even though it may not seem like it because I’m squirming or moving. I don’t even wonder what’s he going to use next or do next, because I am so detached from my mind. It’s a vacation from everything. I can ride the high for a pretty good chunk of time when he’s done, but it’s not the same, because my mind is revving back up. And that’s okay, because I’ve had my get away.
There is also the fact that a really good spanking gets me so over aroused and it is almost impossible to have an orgasm after that. (I think that’s where the aforementioned “Orgasm Schorgasm!” phrase came into existence).
I love orgasms, don’t get me wrong, but if I don’t get an orgasm, it has never disappointed me. I’m so satisfied from the other things we’re doing; I very rarely have a desire to masturbate anymore.
And honestly, I’m not leaving his house frustrated if I don’t get a spanking (although luckily I rarely leave without 1 or the other), but given the choice, I just always seem to choose the spanking...my vacation from reality and all cognizant thought process. My stress goes away, sometimes only temporarily, but it’s gone. I’m not worried or anxious. It’s like I’m in paradise and all I have to do to get there is bend over.